Esther and Katy

Me, Dad, Esther and the puppies!

Me, Aunty Poo Choo and Esther

Katy, me and mum and the bee farm 

Baby Chloe's sleeping so sweetly 

Baby Chloe 

Sleep

It's been a pretty restful week.. Especially last nite - slept at 7pm! Was so tired.. wanted to go take a bath and then go for prayer meet... The bed looked so tempting.. the next thing i knew -it was 1am!!!! Went back to sleep at about 2.30am - house had a short black out.. And it was really good to have the electricity back..
Feel slightly lost this week - probably because of the lack of the usual hectic activity - had to clear a lot of things as part of Hillsong preparation.. But now that I didn't go, it's just sooo - weird..

Baby Chloe

Went to see baby Chloe yesterday... She's so adorable!! There's just something special in holding 5 day year old baby... My family was just taking turns carrying her and just watching every little movement she made - her yawns, her smile, her scrounging of face and her sleeping so peacefully..
Will put up a pic of her once Esther sends it over.. :P

No visa... but it's ok, :) He still makes me smile

Ahhh... been having a restful Sunday afternoon.. My first in... I can't remember how long..
I've realised that I've rarely blogged on a Sunday too..
My cough is heaps better - probably due to the much needed rest.. :P
For today, I just went to church, went to ABS class on Old Testament by Low Chai Hock (as usual, it's been fantastic even though he gets a bit incoherent with his vertigo.. ), had lunch with my family and basically went home, read excerpts of Jim Elliot's diary and just Konked Out. Didn't realised I was that tired.. Am just so used to my very fast paced life where it's just one thing after another.. Woke up only at 7pm!! went out for dinner, went to Pasar Malam (night market) and came home, watched some tv and now blogging for a bit before watching CSI and just go back to get some sleep... It's been just good to rest... Hinei!! (apparently it's a Hebrew expression for 'very good'.. hehehe am learning well from my ABS classes -it's been just worth it to not go to Hillsong just to listen and learn from the ABS class.)
Think that I should add that I didn't get my visa... But am just so blessed at the same time... Have had so many ppl just concerned for me- either calling me, SMSing me or just coming up to me to ask me I'm ok.. Am just feeling very well loved.. And that's why He makes me smile -through them -everyone that has just been concerned for me (people in church who I have no clue of their names even have been coming up to me and to ask if I was ok)..
Thank You Jesus for just loving me!!!
I was just shocked initially and really disappointed cos as I've said, I really was looking forward to visiting friends and family there and also to have my much needed R&R as I have been feeling rather worn out. Realise that I've not actually have had much of a break since Easter preparations in February.. Uncle Sam (Ministry coordinator/pastor) has just been really concerned for me that I'm getting burnt out..
But am just having this 'peace that passes all understanding' about not going.. For some reason, I do just feel that it's just God's will for me NOT to go.. He's just allayed all my fears -especially about the air ticket refund(Just am praying that tomorrow, the Australian embassy will be able to date that the rejection of visa was on Friday and I'll be able to get the refund!).
Just realised to that it's ONE YEAR that I've been working in church!! (I started in July 2004)..

Dear Father in Heaven,
Thanks for just seeing me through this time.. Though Your ways are hard to understand at times, thank You heaps for watching over me and showing that You still care through so many ppl..
Thank You too for seeing me through the year.. am so excited to just serve You in the next year and see where You lead me.. Continue to hold my hand... I need You to lead and guide me for without You I will truly be lost.

Psalm 138

As I wait on Him, He speaks through His Word.

Psalm 138
Of David.

I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart;
before the "gods" I will sing your praise.

I will bow down toward your holy temple
and will praise your name for your love and your faithfulness,
for you have exalted above all things your name and your word.

When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted.

May all the kings of the earth praise you, O LORD,
when they hear the words of your mouth.

May they sing of the ways of the LORD,
for the glory of the LORD is great.

Though the LORD is on high, he looks upon the lowly,
but the proud he knows from afar.

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life;
you stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes,
with your right hand you save me.

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O LORD, endures forever— do not abandon the works of your hands.

It's a GIRL!!

Congrats to Kenny and Sue Yap!! Their baby girl Chloe Yap Huey Ern-was born today at 12.52pm at Sunway Medical Hospital.
Mum and daughter are doing well.. "The baby's 3.21kg" - proclaims the happy daddy..

Waiting...

Discovered that there are complications with my visa on Monday... Was just rather disorientated since Monday afternoon when I received the call from Uncle Lawrence to go to the embassy. To cut the long story short, was running around like a headless chicken to get the necessary documents and to prepare letters as well..

To be honest, I have been somewhat discouraged by the turn of event at times... I think that I just can't stand the wait.. I have continually surrendered it to God and am fine even if I don't go.. But it's the wait that's getting to me- should I start packing or wait for the results? What should I do Lord?? Am just so confused.. Do You or don't You want me to go?? And here I thought that You were opening doors for me so I could not only catch up with family and old friends but to minister to some of them as well... Is this of You or not?

But am encouraged to know that many of my family and friends are praying for me-many in Australia as well as Malaysia.. Some have even said that they are feeling 'kan chiong' on my behalf and are waiting with bated breath for the results too. Another friend said that she lost sleep over it last night. My prayer partner prayed with me over Yahoo Messenger - first time I have ever done that - and I just felt so comforted and lifted up... Am touched by the care and concern that many have shown me in this time...

Dear God,
Thank You for absolutely fantastic family and friends who are such a comfort from You in this time.. Help me to be patient and to wait and trust in You a whole lot more in this matter. Open the doors that You want opened and shut the doors that You want shut. Grant me peace and strength..
Abba Father, I look to You.

Scramblings...

Got majorly sidetracked yesterday..
So I find myself scrambling to finish a lot of work today- my fault I guess.. :P
Have written about 20 emails today.. Not as much as Tuesday(I think I typed about 30)..
On top of that, I am doing my itinerary and report on the side.
Managed to get the tracts that Ps Tay from Australia wanted - only to find out he wanted more stuff from the same store when I got back *sigh*...
Then again, I'm happy cos I managed to help OM(Operation Mobilisation), my all time favourite missions organisation (I'm biased-my mum and dad was in OM before) to get ppl to help them today.. So I'm glad I can contribute a bit towards that in the midst of my busy-ness...
At least I've started my report to the church leaders on Tung Ling -it's just been taking me a really long time to get down to it :P.. Will have to finish it before I go... Managed to sort out a small part of my itinerary in Melbourne too..
Tonight, am planning to get a haircut and rush home to do some more Bible Study on Romans...
Oh! what a life I lead!
OK back to the fray..

Dear God,
Grant me strength and teach me to continually rest in You. Teach me to do a LOT for You and yet include You in everything I do and to grow in You...
*sigh* it looks like I'm going to have to scramble all worship preparations into tomorrow.

MBTI

Am talking to fiona..
Decided to take the MBTI test. Found out I was a ESFJ- same as Fiona.. pretty funny..
Explanation of the profile
http://keirsey.com/personality/sjef.html
http://typelogic.com/esfj.html

Preparation for Hillsong!

It's almost 5pm... still have heaps to do but I thought that I'll just blog something about my hillsong preparation...
I so can't believe it, I'll be leaving for Australia next Saturday (2nd July!!!)... Have almost been 3 years since I last left.. AM SO LoOking forward to see my friends again(Elizabeth, John, Johann,Vern Li, Poh Lyn, David, Karen, Adeline), my family(tuaku and aunty Margaret and Joseph), Uncle and Aunty Sharon and just go down memory lane and just visit old haunts again. Am also looking forward to worshipping in my old church- Richmond AOG.. Really love the worship atmostphere there- we get ppl from 26 ethnic background worshipping there every Sunday and it's just so awesome!

In the meantime, have so much to do! Preparation for my absence is just so NO JOKE! Have to inform ppl in 3 ministries that I'm involved -
Missions Dept: Do seminar stuff this Saturday and just inform everyone I'll not be around next week
Cross Gen: Rush up to finish Bible study questions for Romans during the two Fridays that I'm not around.
Worship Ministry: Buy all the stuff(tracks, booklets, shopping) for Hillsong for Ps Tay, Buy the baby gift for Ta Shing before I go, still finish my weekly duties and preparations for Sunday worship, prepare for Sunday Worship on the weeks I'm absent, ensure all the hillsong tags arrive, and the list goes on and on and on and on.

On the side, still have to arrange my flight ticket from Sydney to Melbourne..
Send my itinerary to my friends and family there..
Get a haircut, get a backpack, start packing my stuff, start getting gifts for friends and family there.. *sigh*
It just never ends.. Am so looking forward to the 9th of July when I finally reach Melbourne and get a much needed holiday!

Dear God
Help me through this time. THanks for being here with me.

My outing at Seremban with my Tung Ling friends

Praise God that I'm feeling considerably better.. My spirits are much brighter too.. Quite a big contrast to my last week's overall mood.
Went to Seremban yesterday to visit Vivienne, check out her church -FGT Seremban, had the famous Seremban beef noodles (it was my first time and it was quite yummy actually), bought Seremban Siew Paus.
I generally had a great time hanging out with some of my Tung Ling friends again.. Sue Min, Fiona, Sally, Vivienne, Andy, Eiran and Jan Sen were all there. Had great fun just catching up with one another, telling jokes (Andy's was especially just bad).. We had that outing cos Sally's going back to Kuching next week after being trained by Pastor Elisha as requested by her pastor in Kuching.
Mum was just against the trip cos she was worried about my health and she really wants to see me get well before I go to Aussie next week for the Hillsong conference.
Sue Min picked me up at 11.00am. By the time we fetched Eiran (BU), Fiona, (OUG), Jan Sen (Puchong) and met up with Andy and Sally at Bukit Jalil, it was already 12.30pm! We parked Sue Min's car somewhere nearby and then we all hopped into Andy's van and off we were to Seremban!
We went to Terminal One, as instructed by Vivienne and somehow ended up going around Seremban town just because we were looking for parking!! To cut a long story short, we ended up at Terminal One, a shopping mall, and walked around while waiting for Vivienne. We saw a poster of Laura there in a school uniform and just had some hillarious laughs along the way..
Vivienne met us, we then went to eat lunch (the time now was about 3pm) - Seremban beef noodles. After that we went to get some siew paus(which is quite yummy!), saw Vivienne's church and ended up at her place at about 5pm. We left at about 6pm after chilling out at her room, listening to a string orchestra recording that she conducted in school, swapped jokes and just had a great time of fellowship. We finally left at about 6pm, dropped everyone else home and I just got in time for my 8.30pm meeting at Adrian Ng's which went pretty well.
By the time I got home at about 11.30pm, I must say that it was pretty satisfying off day. *BIG GRIN*.

Dear God,
Thank You for yesterday and the fellowship I had with my friends. I pray for Sally who'll be going off next week that you continually watch over her and bless her.

Molding, shaping..

Must say that this past week have prolly been one of the toughest week for me. It’s been pretty frustrating because the flu had just really got to me.
I went to see the doctor (I rarely see the doctor when I’m sick unless it’s really bad), took my medications faithfully, ensured that I slept at least 9 hours every night, took ½ hour naps during lunch time, ate non-fried stuff (Really tough for me- I must confess that I just love fried stuff) and kept up just taking healthy foods only.. :P
I’m finally much better after almost a week of torture – though my nose has not totally recovered and my cough is still there (though less frequently today – praise God!!)..
I found that my sickness in body just really affected my spirit as well… Was just quite down in spirit and was bombarded with depressing thoughts especially in terms of ministry.
Am just so glad that I’m feeling much better today. Ps Kenneth Chin came to Cross Gen and spoke on mentoring last nite. As usual, his preaching really spoke to me in a powerful way. A few things stick out in my mind.

- Christian means to be “little Christs”. When ppl see me, do they see Christ in me??
- Christ wants to continually build my character
- Mentoring is - that you have spiritual sons/daughters and produce ppl that can do the job better than you –if not better. The mentoring relationship is a really beautiful one-but can be difficult to be in as it's part of molding your character. There needs to be submissiveness and teachability. While Ps Kenneth was speaking, I just reflected on this and am so glad that I have this relationship with Sue Ann. It’s just helped me to grow a lot in the past half year. We guess that we just now have to work on the rebuking each other bit. :P
- Caring for people is very important. When you care, you will make that extra effort. When you care, strategies for ministry will come out. This has always been one of my greatest struggle. Sometimes, I’ve wished that I didn’t care so much – so passionately and intently. I’d get less hurt this way. During my lowest, I’d find it hard to accept that God has made me thus. Many are the times, I’d wish that I could be like some ppl around me who seemingly don’t care all that much about what they do-how they affect others with their actions. Someone close to me occasionally says “Don’t be so seriouslaa, Always so stressed”. But I just can’t help it. I’m serious because I care – that’s just the way He made me. After last night, God reminded me that it’s great to be the way He made me... Seriousness and all.

Dear God,
Thank You for this past week, tough-though it's been -cos I know that you're continually molding me to be like You. Thank You just speaking to me. Never let me go.

Bad cough, bad flu

That's what the doctor say...

Am feeling heaps better after spending almost two days in bed..
Though that has barely made a dent in the cough and flu...
Hope I get better soon.

Sit, Walk, Stand

Flu's being contained today.. Apart from the occasional sneezing and sniffing.. It's not so bad - so far at least.
At least my body's not feeling so crappy today too...

Am currently reading "Sit, Walk, Stand" by Watchman Nee(my current hero of faith). It about Ephesians... It's just relevant right now as I study through the book of Romans- helps to consolidate my doctrines and just a great reminder of how I need to "sit" and rest so much more before I walk and stand.

FLU coming!!! Arrgghhh!!

*Sigh*..
Am getting a flu today! Just started sniffing and sneezing during lunch time..
I can't afford to get sick this week (I can't afford to get sick at all! there's heaps to do as usual)... I'm worship leading this weekend!
I've been getting at least 8-9 hours sleep the past two days and yet- doesn't seem to be doing much to heal it!! Aaarrrggghh..
Am frustrated because am feeling bleary and I therefore seem to be working half my normal speed.. plus I spend a lot of time trying to recall things because my mind's just going blank.. *sigh*.. I can't even finish the report that was due today -am just so not up to it..
But my time with Him was great today - though I was feeling really sleepy. Was refreshed for a short while and my spirit found rest - despite my body feeling crappy and pulling my spirit down earlier in the morning.
AM just looking forward to go home to SLEEP and sleep and sleep (heheh-now sounding like Eiran and Jan Sen)...

Dear God,
Thanks for that wonderful time that I had with you in this morning.. Please heal my body-before my flu gets worse so that I can lead Your people into worship - if not, please prepare Jason to take over(hahahah)..