To be free again...

You know, there has been days when I never thought I'd feel this way again. This genuine sense of lightness within. This sense of deep joy - that have seemed to be lost for a while now, that it seems a bit alien and that I can hardly believe that it is real. I just feel like weeping. The pessimistic voice within says that it won't last for too long. But for now, for this moment, I feel liberated. The darkness that has been my companion deep within in the last few months seem to have disappeared.

The chains that have bound a part of me seems to be broken. Yet, a part of me feels afraid. Afraid that the chains will be back and afraid of what this liberation might mean - the implications that it will bring. After all, the darkness have become familiar - a place to hide my fears behind.

Yet, I hear His gentle voice calling to me. It is time to come out to the light again. To embrace again all that He has prepared for me. To put my fears behind and to revel in the day. To let go of the pain and to grasp onto the hand that He stretches out to me. To believe again. To love and to hold on to what is different within because He has made it so because to let it go or to destroy it would mean a greater loss.