Reflection on Worship Retreat

Have been meaning to write this post in the last few days. For a host of reasons (needed post-retreat rest, assignments, etc...) was not able to until now. Just submitted an assignment - feels liberating... Have a few more to go. :p

Anyways - back on thoughts of Worship Retreat. This was the second one I've organised for the Worship Ministry in my church. It was more challenging as last minute, I ended handling all the details (did I mention that I'm in the midst of assignment season? :p This just meant that last week was an almost impossible week).

In the end, it was pretty worth it. I must say that it wasn't perfect - then again I wouldn't wish it to be. However, the group was small enough that the fellowship was really good and meaningful. The sense unity in the group was amazing - in the discussion and in the worship sessions. It was also timely as many in the team have been feeling rather tired. Ps Soon Hock messages really hit the areas that really needed to be addressed. Everyone was challenged by his messages -about our lives on/off stage, how we need to move on from where we are, the forms of worship (our church culture and who we want to reach out to). It was a good time of thinking and discussion on the the ministry. It was an encouragement to see both young and old in worship and in agreement with one another - though some of the discussion was funny. I think Ps have not realised what an odd bunch of people in the church he was inheriting (especially when we were discussing about lighting in the church- he was giving us funny looks- like in the pic below - when many said they were more comfortable with worshiping in the dark... kekeke).

My friendship with a friend also went deeper as we shared our stories and struggle with one another. I saw another side her and marriage through the sharing time. Gave me lots of food for thought. Also, I didn't feel so alone in my struggles cos she's been through more or less the same thing. We both saw how far God's brought us and how he's continually healing our lives. It was really awesome. Worship held more meaning for me after sharing - to continually know that He loves me and that I'm not alone....

I've also learnt to love the people in the ministry more as I get to know them more. Some of their quirkiness are rather endearing. The fellowship times over meals and mamak was rather fun as we spent time bonding with one another. I rather enjoyed the devotion time - I think it really spoke to many of us as we shared based on the material provided by Ps. On the overall, it was a great time.


Dear God,
Thanks for being with us at the retreat. It was a great time especially since you were there. Thanks so much for everything at the retreat!

Food, Food, Food

It's been a rather hectic weekend - the usual rush around with stuff at church this weekend. Friday with college group and rushing to get a thing or two done for Saturday. On Saturday, chaired a meeting (that's usually done by my boss but he had to move house-so that was that), Rushed to a lunch thingo - a really cool lady and her husband from church invited all church staff for lunch and it was absolutely lovely! We had home made poh piah, Nasi lemak that was absolutely fantastic - there were fried chicken, beef rendang, sotong and petai, sotong with sambal, some cupcakes with nuts, there was some home made kuih and home made 'goreng pisang' (fried banana). To top everything, there was fantastic coffee to finish the meal. It was an awesome treat. :) I enjoyed the fellowship with the office staff. It was a great lunch.
After lunch, we rushed back to church. Had worship practice (which thankfully wasn't as disastrous as the weekend before). Was worn out by the time 5.30 came.

Hung out with Tim and Jon - they kindly agreed to pick my sis from the lrt station and took us for dinner. We had lovely nasi lemak at another place that we have not been for a long time. Tim and Jon were rather amusing to be with as usual. But have come to love those two like my own brothers. They are really colourful characters - reminds me a bit of my family at times. *fond grin*. Had a nice evening with my sister. We watched "The Holiday" on DVD together and just hung out. I went to sleep after.

Tim and Jon (who have dubbed themselves as my drivers to church when my mum's not around) picked me up to church around 7 something and we went for breakfast together. The journey in the car was highly entertaining as usual. Jon has a really bad sense of direction - for the umpteenth time we had to direct him how to get to church from my house - so it made for an interesting ride on top of the constant brotherly bickering that those two are always involved in. kekkee

The time of Praise and Worship went well with one or two negligible hiccups. Am becoming fond of my new senior pastor and his wife. Am just very touched to see them come and pray with the team each week and show concern in the worship team. I think he had a good talk with Kerry and he played well on the drums today - better control of the volume.

Senior Pastor gave a practical, encouraging sermon about seeing changes - that we need to seek God to see changes(starting with ourselves). I particularly liked his peanuts illustration - about Lucy saying that she wants to change the world if she had the power. The other character said, "How would you do that?". Lucy replied "I would start by changing you." It was a refreshing perspective. God changes the world by changing me. Hmmm....

After service, had the usual feedback and prayer session followed by a special short meeting with the worship ministry members which went well. Helped out aunty Siew Leng on a special request with the children. *slight shudder* It was a bit chaotic :p. Thankfully it ended well. I really admire uncle Daniel with the way he relates with the children.

Had lunch(food again!) with some ex-cross gen leaders (now college group and young adults leaders) as well with pastor 'Choon' and Senior pastor and his wife. It was a good time of discussion. We were encouraged by Sr Pastor though we didn't settle on anything concrete - his insistence on us to continue to seek the Lord for our ministry and not pressing our own agenda is consistently a good reminder for us. We had a short discussion about personalities (Sr pastor says that he's an introvert - which makes it quite interesting cos most extroverts tend to hold prominent positions in our church - not to say that we don't have introverted leaders). I like something that he said - introverts think before they talk and extroverts talk to think out stuff. Made a few of us appreciate that aspect of ourselves more. *grin*

Came back to STM and had more food with a lecturer and his wife. It was a good time of fellowship as well.

All in all - it was a great weekend with lots of food (of course!). hehehhe

*slightly cynical* thoughts

It's been a long week. I've been sleep deprived - my perfectionist tendecies kicked in the last week as I was preparing a sermon for my homiletics class and I ended up having sleep for about 3-4 hours a night. All that said, the sermon went pretty ok yesterday morning (especially after 2 hours of sleep). I was finally satisfied with what I had at 5.30 in the morning. My class was at 9am.

I think I have caught up with my much needed sleep - though the rush back to my church in PJ has taken its toll and I'm rather sleepy at the moment. Am sitting in the main sanc now while waiting for the college group to start. Was rather surprise to see that there's an event in my church. I find it a bit bizzarre actually. There's bunch of musicians and a bunch of ladies (and one or two men!) twirling around on the stage in white and with some poles which is suppose to hold up wings! One of the things that come up in my head as I watch them is that - they should use their energies better to reach out to those who are poor and downtrodden if they can put up so much energy into an event like this.

They've been singing "commune with me" over and over and over and over again in the last 20 minutes - bizarre huh? I guess that I'm a bit cynical - but in view of what I shared for the sermon yesterday and my conversation with a friend after that, it's a bit more understandable I suppose.

I shared about how the Christian life needs to be transformed. My friend agreed with me that our worship and what we do in church would be meaningless otherwise. If we do not walk the ways of Christ, it doesn't matter what we sing, it doesn't matter what we say. We Christians really need to work more on the renewal of our minds. *sigh*

Post Shock

I have a pile of work to do- namely worship related stuff, dorm stuff and preaching preparations. My hands are somewhat shaky as I type this out and my emotions are not quite calm. Am just in a state of post shock.

Had an accident on the way back- a friend was driving. I guess we're both recovering from the image of the motorcyclist flying and hitting the poles. One of the motorcyclist was bleeding rather badly and for a moment I did wonder if he broke anything. It was like from one of the scenes that they have on tv on drive safely campaign - only this time it was real.
By the grace of God, we managed to find a hospital, get advice from some friends and was in the right mind to tell my friend to call her church leaders to ask for help. They were helpful when they arrived at the hospital and thankfully managed to settle amicably.

I thank God that nothing more serious happened- no one broke a limb and stuff like that. My friend's car has a dent and the motorcycle still worked (though the engine was a bit crappy after the incident). I thank God for friends that helped. Thank God for calmness so that I could be a support for my friend on the way back. Thank God that the other two people were not unreasonable, though one of them was a bit of a pain. :P Will probably have a good cry after this - am in no mood to do work. Through it all I am amazed by God's hand over this - for his grace and mercy and his covering.

A short entry

It's assignment period- need I say more? It's the usual cagey feeling that I hate - the feeling of being stuck to the infernal chair when one could be doing other more fun things to do - but such is life I guess. :p There are times when one just have to sit down.

Prayers are definitely coveted at this time.

*sigh* back to the drawing board..

I come to You

I come to You, O Creator of the earth
Acknowledging that you are my Creator

And I am merely your creation
I thank You for breath of life, for each new day
For the blessings, for the joy
For the pain and the trials

I come to You, my blessed Redeemer
I call You Saviour
With a heart that is grateful
For the grace that's been given
For the price that You've paid
I'm in awe that You would choose to love one such as me

I come to You, my Best Friend
You've heard my prayers through the years
Both great and small, both praise and petition
You've always been there through the bad and good
And though friends may forsake me
Though those that I depend on fail me
You alone have always been there

I come to You, Lover of my Soul
Words cannot describe the love that I have for You
You fill the void deep within me
With love that overflows for You alone
I cannot help revel and savour this love you have for me in silence
For words are lost to me in such moments

Psalm 25

Of David.

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;

in you I trust, O my God.

Do not let me be put to shame,

nor let my enemies triumph over me.

No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame,

but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse.

Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths;
guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior,

and my hope is in you all day long.

Remember, O LORD, your great mercy and love,

for they are from of old.

Remember not the sins of my youth

and my rebellious ways;

according to your love remember me,

for you are good, O LORD.

Good and upright is the LORD;

therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.

He guides the humble in what is right

and teaches them his way.

All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful

for those who keep the demands of his covenant.

For the sake of your name, O LORD,

forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD ?

He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.

He will spend his days in prosperity,

and his descendants will inherit the land.

The LORD confides in those who fear him;

he makes his covenant known to them.

My eyes are ever on the LORD,

for only he will release my feet from the snare.

Turn to me and be gracious to me,

for I am lonely and afflicted.

The troubles of my heart have multiplied;

free me from my anguish.

Look upon my affliction and my distress

and take away all my sins.

See how my enemies have increased

and how fiercely they hate me!

Guard my life and rescue me;

let me not be put to shame,

for I take refuge in you.

May integrity and uprightness protect me,

because my hope is in you.

Redeem Israel, O God,

from all their troubles!

********************************************

There is just something about this psalm that just hits me whenever I read it. A part of me can't help but respond in worship...

Assignment time!

• Stressed (from a bit to a lot)
• Bleary
• Very focused on work for spurts of time (depending on when the assignment's due)
• Rather be elsewhere (movies, reading a non-assignment book)
• Library camp out (so that one does not fall asleep in the bed room)
• All nighters
• Try not to get sick
• Sleepy
• Rather be doing something else!
• Listen to music to calm nerves
• Multi-tasking
• End up doing other things at times (like blogging-keke)

Thoughts

"Let go.. trust me..." the still small voice said. "No! I just can't" she yelled, tears of frustration sounded in her voice. "I'll lose everything! My world will fall apart! I cannot let go! Do you understand what you're asking me to do?"

"Trust me and let go.." the still small voice said again "I love you... Do you love me?"
"If you love me, you will obey me."

She was so torn. She was afraid. "What ifs" were running in her mind. A part of her wanted to let go and just trust him - the other part just screamed to hold on. Why did she had to let go? Her world was so happy before. "No. You weren't totally happy. Admit it. A part of you were miserable - only, you hid it well." - the brutal, honest voice in her voiced out. "Let go - who knows where you'll end up. But He's never failed you before right?" "I'm afraid. I'm afraid of what'll happen when I let go. I'm afraid of change. I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid I'll never find something like it again." "Trust Him..."

"Trust me..." the still small voice spoke to her turbulent heart.

Like a small child, she closed her eyes and slowly, slowly let go - blood dripping from her hands from holding on so tightly.

A few months later
Her world is now different - just as had once she feared. Her hands are scarred somewhat - though healing nicely because of the healing touch of her Father - a reminder of a time past. Yet, a peace that surpasses understanding surrounds her. She's much stronger now that she is no longer bleeding.

"Trust me" a still small voice says to her daily.

"I will, my Father. At least, I'll try. Catch me when I fall ya?" a smile in her voice as she replies.

**********************************

Writer's note: Sometimes I feel as if God asks me to let go of something that I feel will tear my world apart if I do. When I finally do let go, my world does fall apart but somehow my world becomes different in a initially scarily strange way but gradually it becomes beautiful. It is as if He continues to correct my lenses and my perspective of the world around me. He teaches me to 'see' another aspect of Him - it's not just a knowing in my head but a knowing with every part of me as I experience it.

I Thank God...

This week has been an amazing week for me. Attended special lectures that really challenged my world view on a certain topic. It was rather like a whole new world being revealed to me. I thank God for the lecturer as his testimonies have rather challenged me to look at my own life.

I thank God for my friends in the picture above - they are an amazing bunch. We moved past a milestone in the journey of our friendship last week and it was awesome. :) Am glad to have them in my life.

I thank God for the opportunity to catch up with a dear friend today. Have not seen her in a while but am glad that we could do so and that we could be an encouragement to each other through our struggles..

I thank God for a conversation that I had with another friend today. It was just good to just talk. Was encouraged from things that I newly learnt about him.

I thank God for my sis and bro. Was extremely happy that they attended ABS(Adult Bible School) today. Am glad that my sis found it interesting enough that she didn't fall asleep. *grin*

Life's not been exactly a bed roses (it rarely is) - but am continually grateful for the small blessing along the way that help me move on.

Recap of the day

It's been a rather long day. Had classes the WHOLE day. Thank God it was raining and gardening ended up being cancelled. Otherwise I would be really really bushed by now(I spent those hours snoozing in my bed instead).

It's been a good day of learning though. I had Corinthians class - I totally agree with Silvester. I really like the reflection part of the class. Much to think about persecution and the church of Malaysia - how being able to worship freely indeed is a privelege. Also was challenged to think about the song "In Christ alone". About how Paul would probably said that in every suffering (instead of victory) his source of strength and hope was Christ.

Had a ball of a time at Christian Education class too. Always come out of the class feeling very challenged and blown away. Herbert Tan's really a great 'educator' (CE jargon - hehehe). Learnt so much stuff - how we need to re-think of the way we teach in church - that many times when we teach we only adress the cognitive part of man (and neglect the emotional and behavioural aspect). We also did discussions on what's the best way of learning for different groups of ppl - it was really interesting to see how different ppl learn. Also learnt how powerful experiential learning is. Herbert gave the example of how someone who was a spiritual father carried this 40-year-old guy up the stairs(this guy's father never hugged or showed any affection through touch) to show a father's love. His experience helped him to understand what it meant when God said in the OT how He would carry his ppl and sing over them. Definitely some stuff to think about there.

Another thing that was kept on being repeated for today is the importance of the church being relevant to the society and community around them - especially with the current issues. We have been slow to address issues around us and many times sweep the more difficult/sensitive issues under the carpet. That being said, I guess that this is true of me too. I have hardly been reading the newspapers lately. Definitely something to examine and continually work on.

Dear Father,
So much to learn today - help it not just be an intellectual exercise. Rather, please help me to connect it to daily life. I want to glorify You in all I do.

To forgive or not to forgive?

It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend. - William Blake

Thoughts

A close friend wrote today to ask me how I've been doing and I've realised that I've not been posting up anything lately - I blame it totally on the almost non-existent internet connection from the girls dorm. :p (ok ok - partly my laziness also laa)..

Going into the fourth week of semester now - there's the 10 assignments that are practically yelling to be done, one special project (still deciding whether i should take it up), the weekly greek stuff and the weekly weekend practical work. Have also finally taken the step to start driving classes. *grin. I can hear my long time friends saying "FINALLY". Will hopefully finished everything by mid March before things begin to get really crazy here. Also have had my first guitar class - might have to be on hold until i find time to practice :p. Sounds really crazy huh - but am rather having a ball of a time. Sometimes I do feel the pressure of time but am happy as a lark for now.

On a more personal side, I am continually glad for the support of friends who continue to rally around me - who show me not necessarily with words but with actions that they care. These couple of days, I've also been having some conversations with some friends which reminded me of the preciousness and fragility of friendship. I attended a talk on bitterness recently and the speaker from RBC recently said that according to statistics, a person is counted fortunate if they can find 5 good friends in their life. I count myself truly blessed cos I have more than that - I consider them a gift from God(haha - i know i'm starting to go on and on but sometimes words cannot adequately express my gratitude). Things have not necessarily been smooth going - but as another wise and good friend said, it's definitely part of God's way of moulding me.

There is a group of friends that I do truly miss - though I may not say much. They've taught me a lot in the last year and I do miss their friendship but at the same time, I cannot ignore the sense of rightness - that I am where I'm supposed to be now. For a long time, sorrow had outweighed joy. However, I do wish them the best with their spiritual journey - perhaps one day I'll say more about it. For now, I can but quote my friend who has written what resonates in my heart:

"God has to teach me that earthly pleasures can only fulfill in proportion to how much they foreshadow heaven's glory. Our earthly friendships, marred by selfishness and separation, must pale in the face of eternity; the surprise is not that our friendships are this fragile, but that they exist at all, in this world where we so often withdraw into ourselves by sin and pain and the fundamental isolation of simply being human. We grieve the friendships which we lose or pause, but in this short and brutish world we should be joyfully astounded that we shared those brief moments together at all. Every moment in which minds meet is a miracle." -Shern Ren-

In the midst of all these happenings, I'm continually challenged by God in my walk with Him. I struggle to blog down openly the joy and the downs of my relationship with Him. There have been times when I've just sat in a dark corner just crying my heart out for more of Him only to be met with silence. And yet, there have been times of joy and peace that surrounds unexpectedly - sometimes in the unlikeliest of places. Am still working out my relationship with Him - but am learning to appreciate the unexpected from Him and to continually trust him in my journey with Him.

Dear God,
I love you because You first loved me. I seek You because You have first sought me. Thank You....

Rant

Am just bloody angry rite now. I had hoped for better. I guess not. They don't care if innocent people are hurt. The important thing is that they are right. Can someone just shoot me if I become like that.

Prayer answered

As I stop to catch my breath this evening, I realise that I've rather unconciously been involving myself in a frenzy of activity the last few days. Today, went for classes, a movie, rushed back for Anglican chapel service, went out with my girl friends for our first prayer meet for the year, came back and went to visit Silvester's baby (who's really cute!), came back and went out for a drink with some friends. Will definitely need to make myself sit down tomorrow to do my work. :p

Was just doing some reflection something Dr Voon said during the retreat last weekend. She said something along the lines where when God asks us to do something, He will make a way for us. Didn't really realise how much I disbelieved that statement until this evening. Was just sharing with my girl friends (during the above said prayer meet) of what God laid on my heart this year - something I felt was a bit impossible to do on my own (it involved sitting still *gulp!* and waking up early! *double gulp*). While sharing with my friends, I felt what I was called to do rather daunting - I remembered that someone I really respected said that it was just not worth the bother and felt discouraged. Before we went to Silvester's place, another friend, without knowing my dilemma, proposed a solution. I was in a daze for a while - kinda still am. Am having an overwhelming sense of wonder and gratitude to KNOW that He does indeed make a way. I know I'll still have to make the effort (its not a stroll in the park) but am grateful that it's no longer as difficult as I thought it'd be. Thank You God.

To My Brother Sam....

Your existence is very much acknowledged!! *Cheeky Grin*Should have posted this up two months ago.. Love you very much! I've been blessed by your presence in my life.

Beginnings of second year in STM...

Everything and nothing is running through my head. Will attempt to type out something here as I've been promising to myself in the last few days that I should.

Am now back in STM for my second year- I can't believe that I'm now a senior (I think most of us in who are in the second year feels the same way). STM is the same and yet different - I think it's cos of the ppl. Most of my fellow class mates in the same year are back - and it has been awesome to meet up with them again. Of course there are the new students. I've made an extra friend or two - it will be interesting to see where the friendship will lead. One of them is my room mate. I've been blessed with a room mate that I can get along with and is pretty cool with the stuff I do (which I think can be a rather tall order for a person who lives with me - just ask my sis. :p). I've also been appointed dorm leader for my floor and overall for the girls (more like volunteered without permission) - and to think that exactly a year ago I thought "I'd never be a dorm leader - after all I can't speak mandarin". :P So much for thinking that in the first place. I am thankful however, for Lucy and Lan Yin who's on my floor. They've been a great support to me and have helped to take the edge off certain changes in my life back here - I think I'd be moping most of the time otherwise. Other than that, it has been a great pleasure to just sit in the evenings with the baby grand and just play to my heart's content. *happy sigh* I really missed it these last two months.

In my quest for a book on prayer by EM Bounds(recommended by my pastor), my friend and librarian has recommended me some books amongst them are two of Henri Nouwen's and 2 other books on spirituality. Am Currently Reading: "A New Kind of Christian" by Brian McLaren. It has been rather challenging. I have to pause after every chapter to really digest and wrestle with what was written. So am taking my time with it for now. It's been really good.

Overall it's been good to be back. It's not totally a bed of roses - there are some concerns (that's usual I guess) such as if I'd survive the assignments, concerns about friendships, ministry in church, etc... I guess I'll just have to commit it to the Lord and worry less and take it one day as it comes.

Dear Lord,
Please see me through this year. Thank You for the blessings that You've given. Thank You.

Growing up...

I have unexpectedly found myself with some time to blog - have been rushing around the whole day to complete the stuff I've to do before for my meeting with my pastor which is supposed to be now(plus the fact that I've taken a last minute leave to go up to the highlands meant that I have to clear tomorrow's workload too). After having a short lunch break (i ate at my desk after rushing downstairs to pack something at the cafeteria) and rushing around making calls, sending emails, clearing my desk, sending even more email and making it just in time for the supposed meeting at 2.30pm- he's asked for another 45 mins.

So i was thinking - to write a newsletter or blog?? Not exactly in writing-a-newsletter mode, so I here I am..

Last nite, a friend asked me about how I've changed in the last two months .I really hadn't had the time to think much about it. So, as I write this, it's a bit of a reflection time for me.

I've learnt to love the church more
Some people around me somehow get the impression that I look at the world with rose-tinted glasses. Trust me - I don't. I'm perfectly aware of the darker side of humanity and yet, I've learnt a long time ago that it's much better to look at the brighter side of things than to focus on the uglier side (of course sometimes I do overdo it - but am still learning how to balance). So, in the past year, while being in STM and exchanging thoughts with my community about the church - especially its weaknesses - I've come back to my home church to realise that I love the people in it very much despite its many weakness. Sure, it's not easy and there are MANY flaws. However, when one learns to focus on their strengths and to move on from there, you realise that the church is not exactly a totally bleak place- it just isn't perfect and people like you and me are a part of it. How we respond to it is important. Some people just sit and do nothing, some people just make comments and do nothing to change, some people just come on Sundays and go back unaffected... As for me, I've learnt that I need try to change what is within my grasp and as for what I cannot change, I learn to talk to the leaders of the church, commit it to God through prayer, and to try to gripe less.

I've learnt to complain less and to encourage more
Am not exactly at the point that I wish to be but I've come to realise time and time again that criticizing people in the church can cause a lot of pain and unnecessary hurts. A close friend of mine was hurt by certain things that the leaders said (some warranted- but mostly were unfounded). When she was doing well, no one said anything, but now that she doesn't seem to be doing very well, for a host of reasons (not necessarily her doing) negative comments seem to come pouring. I've realised that many times, I myself have not said much words of encouragement in the past year as I struggle with the issues in church. I've learnt that it is very important to do so. As I worked alongside with the children vacation workshop teachers, i was one day led to say "you're doing very well to a teacher". She had been working very hard and was very tired - I could visibly see her lighting up at my comment. It felt funny for me initially and I came to the realisation that I need to speak words of encouragement and to watch my words.

I've learnt to be more intentional
I guess that this is a lesson that I've been learning from my community in the past year. I've learnt that I CAN take breaks in between my work and be more intentional in building relationship with people. Am still learning it. I realise I do have a tendency to be so focused on certain things and neglect my relationship with people (some more than others). I've learnt that I need to include time for other people. I've been blessed by my time with people as I do so and I hope that I'm a blessing to others as I do so. I've learnt that as I do this, I hear stories about how God is working in people's lives or how much they need God in their lives.

Like I told my friend last nite, I've definitely changed. In some areas more than others. Some areas are definitely more visible than others.
However, there are areas in which I hope do not change:
That I would continue to have an attitude that is willing to learn and that I would desire to draw closer to God more and more each day.

Dear God,
Thank You for being with me - through each step, each stumble, each fall, each leap, each run in the past two months. I look forward to learning more this year - through family, friends, church, bible school - people that you bring across my path. Continue to teach me to love you more and to walk the path that you will me to.

A New Year...

A Happy New Year to all who's still faithfully reading my blog. I am encouraged when I hear from friends who tell me that they read my blog despite my lack of entries lately - Thank You. :)

With the flurry of activities in the last month, I realised I have not have had the time to do much journalling - much less blogging. Nevertheless, the last month has been a time of growth and challenge to me as I learn from the different situations that I come across as I do my practicum in my church. These two months have been a good time of learning as I am encouraged to broaden my horizons in different areas. I am looking forward to starting classes in two weeks time and especially to catch up with my friends at STM.

Some highlights of the last two weeks are that my ex-housemate from Australia came back for a visit. While it was a rather brief time with her, it was awfully good to see her again. Hanging out with her is always an eye-opening time. I'm continually reminded about how different life can be outside my comfort zone - how much people hurt and are in need.

My big bro came back for a brief visit from Aussieland too. It was awfully good to catch up with him too as he came back to Malaysia to do his 'pilgrimage'. My time with him brought back many good memories. I feel so blessed that he came here just to visit me and another of his friend. Thanks big bro.

Another highlight is that I spent about another 5-6 days in the highlands. It wasn't as restful as I thought it'd be -especially as there were many people going in and out. I met 3 delightful OA girls - Ina, Julia and Yuzzi - who wanted my family to adopt them at the end of the trip. :) It was the first time I spent Christmas eve at an anglican service - we rushed up to the highlands right after the Christmas musical on Sunday. I was really blessed by the service (though I did wish that they'd sing more carols.. I was especially moved by the sharing of the story of 'O Holy Night"). Early Christmas morn, we were joined by a team of my dad's friends and we headed into the jungle to distribute much needed supplies to those who were in need. That was pretty much what we did for the entire day and it was quite exhausting as we spent most of the day travelling on rather bumpy roads - at one point of time, the 4 wheel drive had to be towed by another truck as it could no longer take it anymore. It initially felt weird but it was a good experience to serve others instead of sitting in the pews of the church on Christmas day. All I can hope is that those that received were blessed by the little that we could give them.
Though I couldn't do the things that I wanted to do, I was thought again what it meant to really give (I certainly did not relish getting up so early - especially after a previously exhausting two weeks). Another day, my dad even made me walk in some really muddy areas just so we could give much needed supplies to another village at one of those areas which he dubs as hard-landing. The ride into the jungle alone can be pretty tiring.

I met another interesting character up in the highlands in my quest for finding internet connection (which I failed cos the internet lines were down due to the earthquake :p). Again, I was reminded how different others lives are from mine. Feel like a 'katak di bawah tempurung' (frog under a coconut shell) whenever I meet people like that - but always a good experience as it challenges my perceptions of life.

As a result of all the stuff that has been going on, I didn't make any New Year's resolution (I remember thinking on 31st during watchnight service - it's the end of the year already??? My body haven't really caught up with my soul yet!!)... Anyways, I'm glad for this new year - to more lessons, to deeper friendships, to new friendships, to challenges, to a closer walk with My Best Friend.

A lesson to remember...

I seem to be in a blogging mood today - never mind that I still have yet to prepare for worship this Sunday and finish up the songbook within the next two days! (eep!)...

Anyways, I attended prayer meeting tonite and met someone new to the church... She was asking me about Jesus' genealogy in the book of Matthew and Luke. It seemed to be very important to her. My recollections of what I learnt in class seems not to be comprehensive enough... :P I think I should try to remember more from classes next semester no matter how trivial the facts may be to me..