Will I regret it?

For the first time in my life, I punched a friend because I was so angry with him. Maybe it's just the frame of mind that I was in. I just didn't figure that he'd be so stupid. I was so angry that I had an athsma attack(more like - I couldn't stop coughing) and I just couldn't breathe- I had to go back to my room and use the inhaler. I told him that I'll talk to him when I was able. The idiot (now understandably) yelled back at me and we both stormed off.

After punching him, I felt partially awful and partially glad that I did it. I felt awful because on hindsight, I shouldn't have done it no matter how angry I was. I felt glad at the same time-because he then knew that I was really angry with him and meant business. I felt so sick at the thought of being nice and acting like he did nothing wrong. I suppose that I'm going to have to apologise for punching him sooner or later.. *sigh*

I keep on wondering how a friendship that started well can end up like this. I know wounds from friends go deeper than those that you don't know.

I keep on wondering - God, when is all this rubbish going to end?